Asking for help during and after pregnancy

Edlayne Fernandes
Jul 7
4 min read

Feeling post-partum overwhelmed

It’s okay to feel overwhelmed after bringing a new human into the world. After all, you’re doing one of the most important jobs ever!

So, if you need help, don’t be afraid to shout it from the rooftops.

Seriously, nobody expects you to be Supermom when you have been discharged from the hospital.

In the next months, you schedule will be different from what it is now. Baby will wake about every 2 and a half hours for feeding and diaper changes, and your life will function in a way that is 100% baby oriented.

It is normal that all you are doing now feels scarce with no time to eat what you would like to, shower, wash your hair or anything else. There is no reason to feel embarrassed about it, most of us have been through this.

Recruiting post-pregnancy help

It is very important to have someone you trust around or nearby that you can call to watch the baby while you feel that washing your hair becomes a luxurious thing to do in the given moment with a newborn baby at home.

Your friends and family are there for you, just waiting to land a hand or a listening ear. Weather you need advice on how to soothe a fussy baby, some company during those late-night feeding shifts, or just someone to hold the baby, watching the baby sleeping while you take a much-deserved shower, fold some clothes or put a sandwich and smoothie together for yourself, PLEASE reach out: “Hey, do you have 30 minutes to stay around and watch the baby while I can eat something or take a shower?”

I confess that I did not have this help after the first 10 days with my newborn baby. My parents had to go back home, and I was left bonding on my own with my baby doll. Those were challenging days. I waited till my husband arrived home from work so I could do it all. I remember I also packed snacks for next day, chopped some fruits and these small actions would allow me more time with my new baby as family wasn’t around and did not have contacts with other stay home female neighbors while I was on maternity leave. We were fairly new in the neighborhood. My back neighbor happened to just have a new baby too. We were both on the same boat.

Post Partum help makes you a Wise Woman

Remember, asking for help doesn’t make you weak or a burden for someone else. This is not a moment to purely socialize with others, it is the moment to do what you got to do with small worry-free moments in between your day. If you have someone coming in to take care of your dishes is also a great help.

This means that asking for help, when you bring a newborn baby home, makes you wise! People will love to help you. They will feel a different meaning in this type of help.

The importance of Post Partum selfcare

Because taking care of yourself is just as important as taking care of your little one. When you feel put together, the experience of taking care of your baby becomes more enjoyable.

Also, not every mom will feel the post-partum blues. Thankfully I did not feel it, but I have empathy for my friends and clients who arrive at the studio with this feeling. I’m so glad they can share it all with me.

If you feel there is something not quite right or unbalanced within your emotions, sharing your feelings with a trustable close friend or relative will help you a lot. Remember asking your health care provider for a list of professionals specialized in listening to new moms.

You can be proactive and have this conversation with your OBGYN before having the baby. After all, we do not know who will be affected by blue emotions. Having a list of extra safe resources including psychologists, therapists, breast feeding nurses, breast milk banks, and others, will bring you a burst of peace of mind. Sometimes nothing serious happens when we feel prepared for possible events. On the other hand, our minds may work in unexpected ways when we feel unprepared for the moment.

Always remember to breathe, hydrate, nourish the body and try to have a short list of people you trust and can be helpful during these powerful 30 minutes when you need time for a shower, bathroom breaks and put something good together to eat.

I hope this girl talk was useful to you. Many of us do not have help or do not talk about this with another person.

My goal is to bring comfort and helpful resources for new moms while dealing with little things of life that become overwhelming if not addressed properly.